The Devil Within

I published my second chapter of "The Devil Within" on Wattpad last night.  You may have missed it, because I published it around 7:30 PM.  Apparently the ideal time to publish items anywhere is closer to 10 PM.  I am not awake at 10 PM--hardly ever. I need to start making more use of my "schedule" button to keep up with all this social media!

I went out to Fiverr and Kelvin Tang made me this fantastic cover. Click below, and it will take you to Wattpad to read my story.

http://www.wattpad.com/story/26698809-the-devil-within

I didn't even know Fiverr existed, until Suzie Jay told me about the site.  She's another author trying to find a following, get discovered, whatever you want to call it (her blog is in my reading list below--check it out!).  I've found out this week that there are tons of us. I've been on twitter trying to promote myself, and there are tons of struggling wannabe authors.  It's no wonder the publishing houses are overwhelmed trying to pick through the slush piles.

I debated putting "The Devil Within" out there for anyone to read.  It's a hard read, psychologically, and I don't know how many people will like it because of that. The thing is, as an author, when I have an idea it just sort of flows from me.  The thoughts come quickly, and I have to get them down on paper.  The story sticks in your mind, and I almost become part of the virtual world I've created,  like I can feel and touch your characters.  I wrote the "Devil Within" in just a few days, because every time I would leave the book I would think about William, the main character, and how much he was hurting.  I couldn't leave him in anguish in one scene for long.  I had to come back and rescue him--with the stroke of a key!

That's what writing's like for me. There's a story, and I have to write it down.  Maybe that's why I have so many half finished stories.  The ideas come more quickly than I can finish them.

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Disappointment

Yesterday was the day.  The letter came in the mail.  The letter from the magnet program, telling me whether or not Number Two would go there. You can probably tell from the title of this post, that he did not get in.  I'm disappointed, but I know he will do fine at the public school near our house. 

I do worry about him. He has an April birthday, so he won't be 5 until then.  Number One was almost six when he started Kindergarten.  I guess we'll just play it by ear next year, see how K goes, and then decide after K what to do.  I really do love the public elementary near our house.  I just worry about middle and high.

Number Two's a lot like me.  He is laid back.  He's super imaginative.  He can play for hours with his Ninjago guys or in the play kitchen.  He makes up stories.  He has a wonderful sense of humor.  I just hope he didn't get my lack of motivation, but it seems like he did.  My lack of motivation plagued me for years. 

When I was young, I didn't understand why I couldn't pull off all As like my older sister.  I'm thinking now, it probably had something to do with the fact that she actually studied, while I barely cracked a book.  I was absorbed in my own little world, and I see that in Number Two also. 

It's not necessarily a bad thing, but we live in an age and time where schools don't reward imagination.  Schools have less and less play time, less and less music time, less recess, less art and MORE tests.  Tests, Tests, Tests.  Our kids will be good at following the rules and taking tests, but will they be able to creatively solve a problem and think outside of the box?  I think Number Two will be able to because those are his natural abilities.  He'll just need to find a purpose and a goal, and afterall that took me 33 years to realize.  He still has some time at 4. 

Just Write

I set a date (in my head), in order to start my revisions on my first draft.  I'm still trying to come up with an appropriate title for the work.  My original title, "What Could Be," does not really fit with the outcome of the book. 

I'm at the point where I want to pull it up and really dig into itwork on it: correcting grammar, fixing mess-ups, and just doing a total revision, but I'm holding off for a few more weeks.  I'm setting the day of the 24th, after my trip to Nashville, and when meet season is (almost) over; when I can actually concentrate on revising the way it needs to be done.

Then, I need to dig further into Writer's Market for possible agents.  Actually, my goal is to do that over the next few weeks: research agents, find agents that will accept unsolicited works, read up on query letters, and formulate a query letter.  Yes, this is like having a second job.  There simply are not enough hours in the day for me to do everything I NEED to do. 

I'm also hard at work on my next piece. I've already written 15,000 words, and I'm just getting started.  This work is different from my first finished work, and I'm going to have to dedicate some serious hours to research and reading, that I simply don't have time for this month.  Did I mention I also have my nose stuck in a 700 page book right now? Underworld by Don Delillo.  I'll probably owe the library $10 by the time I finish it, because I keep forgetting to renew it.  There's no excuse for that either, because I can renew on line: pure laziness on my part! I need to finish it so I can look into the list of history books my friend Scout provided me.  It pays to have a history professor as your friend! 

This second piece is sticking with me more than the first. Sometimes I pull up "What Could Be," and I marvel at the fact that I actually wrote it.  I remember writing it, but it almost seems I was outside of myself when I did it.  I know that it all came from me though, my subconscious, my thoughts, but it just seems so surreal that I put all that down on paper.  I don't feel the same with the second work.  I feel more connected to it.  Maybe because I finished the first work, I'm feeling more confident in the second one. 

Goals for 2013

I just pushed a button on my phone, setting a huge GOAL for 2013 for myself.  My goals for this coming year are similar and different from last year. 

Here they are, in no particular order:

• Run 315 miles this year: I set a RunKeeper goal to run 315 miles.  This is slightly over 2 miles 3 times a week.  Basically, this means I have to run on all my Taekwondo off days, plus maybe on a few Taekwondo on days.  I'm sure I can do it.

• Run a 5K: I'm setting a goal to run ONE 5K.  I actually hope I can do this somewhere around March or so.  I'm also doing a training program with RunKeeper, to get me prepared.  Now if I can just get over this cold and hit the pavement a little bit more.

• Finish my Novel: This is one of my biggest goals this year.  I should be done in the next month or so, I'm guessing.  I've already reached the climax and my main character is just floundering right now in between two large life decisions.  I need to get her settled and then put it away, returning to it to edit.  Some of you may be lucky enough to read the first draft!

• Start working on Short Stories: I've never been a short story writer, but I really think they are the key to getting novels published.  If you can get some short stories published, then you'll have recognition that will help you with a longer piece.  So I'm going to try my hand at it.

• Keep the Weight Off: Clean out my closet of all the too-big clothes and keep the weight off.  I'm going to do this by maintaining my healthy diet and incorporating exercise in my life every day (see above). 

So those are my goals this year!  I'm psyched to accomplish them and to see what 2013 holds!

The Goal Post

The Goal Post

This past week, I went to visit my sister.  She has newborn twins.  They are amazing.  I am in total love with them.  I wish they lived closer, so I could help her more, and who knows...quit my job and be a nanny to them! There is nothing more amazing then holding new life in your arms, seeing their little faces light up and watching babies grow and learn how to explore the world. 

Here's an Update on my Goals from Last Week:

• Work on Novel: Because of my little trip, my novel was pushed on the back burner again. I don't need to lose my motivation.  I need to pick it up and start writing again.  I have it all plotted out. It's a matter of getting the words on paper.  There simply are not enough hours in the day for me to do everything I want to do!

• Run 1.75 miles: I ran 1.90 miles and then 2.10 miles.  So, I went over my goal.  I have a complete love for running.  When I was visiting my sister, I kept seeing runners, and I envied them!  I achieved my goals this week by turning off the voice of the RunKeeper lady who tells you how long you've been running, but I kept the distance measure on. I do feel like it is getting easier for me.  I don't feel like stopping anymore, and my breathing has gotten better.  I slowed my pace as many of my friends recommended, and it really helped.

Goals for the Upcoming Week

• Work on My Novel: I'm starring this goal.  If I don't make any of my goals except this one this week, I'll be happy.  I did spend some time last week looking into how to get published. I looked at self-publishing and regular publishing.  I don't think self publishing is the way to go, because everyone is self publishing these days.  It is hard to get adult fiction books published nowadays, so I know once I finish the work then I'll have more work cut out for me.

• Run 2.0 miles consistently: Ok, so I did make my 2.0 mile goal last week, but I don't want to increase too much too quickly.  I need o make sure my body is okay with building up slowly, and I don't injure something. 

• Clean Out My Closet: I posted yesterday about getting rid of bigger clothes.  I need to do this.  I need to clean out my closet completely, box up clothes to give back to friends, and to give to charity.  I need to do the same to my kids' closets.  I have tons of boy clothes to give to my sister who will need them again!

The Muse

The Muse has come, sitting in the back of my mind, guiding my writing.  Yesterday I sat, earphones plugged in, and wrote 11 pages quite easily.  I'm just going to write and write and write as the ideas come, and then I'll edit.  I'm not sure this is the best idea, as the editing job will become huge, but when the ideas are flowing like water it is best to scribble them down somewhere.

When I was in high school, I went to Oxford, Mississippi.  I saw Faulkner's house, Rowan Oak. Faulkner is one of my favorite authors.  In his bedroom, he had written chapters of books, thoughts as they came on the walls, needing to release them from his mind so eventually they could make it to paper and then to print.  This image is still imprinted in my mind: he had a need to write.  I have a need to write, and at this point it doesn't matter if I ever get published.  It's just something I need to do.

On Friday, I read a short chap book by Brent Spencer, Dialogue Tips & Traps: A Guide for Fiction Writers.  This extremely short book (50 pages) combines humor and common sense tips on writing effective dialogue.  Some of the pointers are basic, but Brent Spencer gives great examples from authors on what to do and what not to do. 

Next up: On Writing by Stephen King. 

I've always felt like reading a lot is necessary in order to be a good writer.  But, in the past I have mostly read fiction.  Since I've never taken a creative writing class, I think reading some books on writing might give me the necessary tools to be a better writer, and who knows, maybe one day get published. 

Thoughts on Writing

Thoughts on Writing

 

DJ Lance is the background noise to my creative juices this morning.  Darling Daughter decided 4:30 AM was as good a time as any to start her day.  She loves Yo Gabba Gabba.  I don't mind it.  I wonder if I should be writing a children's book, instead of attempting a novel.

I've realized a few things about novel writing this week. 

• I have too many ideas in my head.  I've started a novel.  I've worked on editing it. I've worked on writing it.  My characters are leading their own lives, moving in the way they are supposed to lead me, the author.  As the ideas are flowing, other ideas for books fill my mind.  When my mind is creating it doesn't want to stop.  I think this is why I have a problem with completion.  I start one story, then I move on when a "better" idea hits me. 

• I really need an editor, but I can't afford one.  I have a tendency to be a perfectionist.  This is not good. I keep going back and making changes, and I don't make progress.  I need to set certain days to write and certain days to edit, so I can make progress.  And eventually...I need to have an editor.

• I need to attend some creative writing classes or seminars.  I need to meet other creative writers and discuss struggles in getting published (very hard to do right now) and editing and character development and dialogue and so on...

A Crafty Site for a Non-Crafty Person

I joined Pinterest today, thanks to the invitation of one of my friends.  I picked categories like: kids, food, home decor, art.  Pinterest automatically linked me to some followers.  Then it linked me to all my friends.  I don't know if they will automatically follow me, but maybe.  And, I just have to let you know that I will NEVER be posting cutesy little projects on there.  Craftiness has always been an enigma to me.

I always wondered how people could look at a piece of cloth and then turn it into something.  Just now, I looked and there was the cutest project ever for kids, a caterpillar made out of buttons.

Source: parents.com via Beth on Pinterest

I mean, come on, anyone can do this but I would never have thought of doing something like this.  It is so adorable, and for some reason when people post things like this it makes me insanely guilty. 

Art in my house is stored in a cabinet in the kitchen.  The cabinet has markers, crayons, Color Wonder, and painting.  The painting rarely is done because of the mess.  My kids will not be crafty, even though some part of my heart would love them to be!  I'd love to sit down on a Saturday or Sunday and make a little button caterpillar, or make something out of cloth.  This creativeness, very much like writing, allows the creator to turn nothing into something, like turning a blank page into a story. 

Craftiness must be a gene I just wasn't born with.  I'd rather throw the kids in the backyard and hit a ball with them, or watch the caterpillar life cycle, or sit on the couch and read a book with them.  I think; however, next weekend we may attempt a button caterpillar.  This thing is just too cute to pass up, and easy even for me!