Inspiraton

Have you ever had a moment of pure inspiration?  Yesterday, I did.  I was in Insanity at the YMCA, and these guys in the front were doing tucks, donkey kicks, and frog jumps almost up to the ceiling.  Meanwhile, I was in the back of the class, raising my knees up and down because anything that involves jumping makes me want to vomit. Well, watching them, I thought, "How hard can that be?"  They inspired me to try it, and when I did it HURT.  It was hard, not something that comes easily, but I was proud for having tried.  After all, if I hadn't tried I would never know if I could do it or not.

I don't know exactly when my moment of inspiration came for me, in regards to my writing.  I have been doing it since I was seven years old; jotting stories down on paper. When I was little, I was obsessed with the Civil War, with boy babies, and with triplets.  You can imagine how my stories read.  But even if something comes so easily for you, it doesn't mean it's easy to get where you want with it.  For the longest time, I wouldn't let anyone read my work. I had a phobia of criticism.  I still feel feel that way. I have this need to know whether the work is good or not, but I'm at the point where I know I need the criticism in order to make myself a better writer.  If my audience doesn't like something, then they may just stop reading, and I don't want that.

Yesterday, I was surfing the net, and I came across this article: 25 Steps to Being a Traditionally Published Author. I laughed as I read this, but part of it made me want to cry.  Writing stops at number 5 or 6, and the rest is about how to land an agent, how to edit, what to do with your work.  There is so much to do after the ink stops flowing, it can be overwhelming or it could be inspiring.  Okay, so maybe inspiring is taking it a little bit far.  I mean, "Can a rejection be inspiring?" It could, if it pushes you to send your work to 50 more agents until you finally get a yes.  It could if the agent writes you a personal note, inspiring you to keep writing, or to change it up, or to toss your current book and start on another.  Inspiration comes in the funniest of ways.

Until then, I'm going to keep editing, keep writing, and keep sending out to agents.  One day I'll be discovered if I'm persistent. I'll follow the rules above, and I'll keep reading and writing: making myself a better writer.


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Deep Thoughts: Yoga and Happiness

Today I went to yoga.  I have slowly started incorporating it into my life again.  The last time I went I was 21 years old, six months from graduating from college, and experiencing great turmoil with all the change taking place in my life.  This time, I'm going to do something for me, something to help make me happy and relaxed.  

I've been thinking of happiness this week, and when I'm in yoga those thoughts spring up too: how to be happy.  I'm finding happiness in my life in unexpected ways: by making new friends, reconnecting with old friends, by setting writing goals AGAIN, and by trying to find contentment and purpose in my every day existence.  I feel so much of life slips away from us while we're staring at our cell phone screen.  So much time simply flies by because we get caught up in trivial problems, and we let them overtake us.  Sometimes we don't meet our true potential, because we are scared of achievement, of putting ourselves out there, and of just doing what we know would truly bring us the greatest happiness and sense of purpose. We are paralyzed by a sense of powerlessness, even though we all have with in us an ability to change our own outcome for the better.  

During yoga, I concentrate on my breathing: in and out, in and out.  I listen to the rhythm my breath makes.  I try to concentrate on the breath, and I usually see it as colors: inhale/red, exhale/blue.  My mind feels free and the tension washes away.  Afterwards, I feel utterly calm and happy.  When my usual smile stretches across my face it feels genuine; it's not just a mask for other hidden feelings.  Wouldn't it be amazing to feel that way every day?  
But, as I read in an article earlier this week, happiness is fleeting and it's meant to be that way.  Humans have an intense want to make temporary things permanent.  They catch onto a feeling that made them feel so wonderful, and they want to feel it over and over again, instead of experiencing it and then letting it go, enjoying the memory, but not wanting to re-live the same moment indefinitely.   

The other day at the dinner table, Number One and I were talking about this, and I said, "Wouldn't it be wonderful if you only felt joy?"  

And he said, wise beyond his nine years, "But Mom, then you wouldn't know what it was because you'd never have felt sorrow."  

And he's so right.  Without sorrow, would joyfulness be less joyful?  Would joy even exist?  

Sometimes after Shavasana, instead of feeling intensely happy, I feel an intense need to cry. I think this is from releasing into the meditation, from letting things go, the need to cry is a physical manifestation of the tension melting away.  Sorrow and happiness all melted into one, like a littmus lozenge (from Because of Winn Dixie).  The feeling is bitter sweet, the letting go of things you carry is hard, because sometimes as you let go you feel like you've lost a part of yourself.  

I believe the key to happiness is living in the moment.  Not looking to the past.  Not looking to the future, but simply being aware of your emotions, being aware of yourself, and living your life in a way that you can accept what has happened, what will happen, and being aware of the inability to change what you can't control.  Setting goals, and realizing you dictate your own future, can help too.  So many people wallow in their sorrow.  They don't find a way to dig out.  They aren't aware of the power inside of them to reach their goals and to live a life that will make them happy.  I, myself, am guilty of this: wondering why I can't get where I want to, but often not taking the action to make a positive change.  Without action, no change can occur: negative or positive.  Why not take the risk?  Without the risk, there can be no chance of failure, but there's also no chance of success.

Find something that makes you happy: be it yoga, reading, Zumba, talking to a friend for hours on the phone, or chasing after your giggling children, who live for today, and don't think about what tomorrow will bring.  Fleeting moments in time.

Weight Loss Tips #19: Don't Stop Moving

First off, I need to apologize for my blog sabbatical.  I was horrendously busy at the end of the school year, and since then I've been walking every morning and reading every night or gymming it.  I've had little time to sit down and blog.  I miss writing when I don't make it part of my life though, so here I am: back!

Weight loss is indeed a simple formula.  Expend more calories than you consume, and you will lose weight.  There are all sorts of people out there touting some miracle way to have the pounds float away: drink cabbage soup for a week, eat only carbs, eat no carbs; but the truth is the way to lose weight and to be more healthy is to eat less and to MOVE MORE. 

I love to be lazy.  I love to sit around and do nothing, especially after a long day at work or a long night up with a toddler who won't sleep, but I really do think the key to long term and long lasting weight loss (think keeping it off forever) is moving as much as you can. 

We spend a lot of time sitting.  If you have a desk job, then you're not moving much unless you make yourself.  If you're just starting this movement thing, then there's no need to jump into going to the gym five days a week unless you really want to.  You just need to start trying to walk 10,000 steps a day.  You can track steps by using a pedometer or a fitness tracker. 

I have the UP24. 

 

 

This little band goes on your wrist, and tracks your life.  The compatible app tracks your steps, and it tells you how many resting calories you're burning and how many active calories.  It tells you the most active you've been during the day, the most idle, and whether or not you've reached your goal. It tracks your weekly trends of movement and sleep.  The app also gives you advice and tells you interesting facts.  It will set goals based on your recent movement (or lack thereof).  It links up to other apps: Myfitnesspal and Mapmyfitness among others. 

 

When I started, I was amazed by my non-workout days.  I was generally moving less than 10,000 steps.  It led me to change little things about my life.  I started trying to take Skippy for a walk every morning to increase my steps.  I started parking at the far end of the parking lot.  I made an effort to get up every thirty minutes and walk around.  I noticed when I started moving more I started feeling better.  I slept better, and the weight started coming off more quickly, because I was expending those calories I was taking in.

 

Once you start moving more, you can make it a lifestyle change.  Similar to reducing portion size, increasing movement will lead to weight loss and better health overall.  I've replaced mornings of sitting with coffee and surfing the Internet to mornings soaking in the sunrise, communing with nature, and increasing my activity!  It's funny how after only three weeks, I feel like it's a way of life.  It's easy to make changes if you do it and you stick to it!  Make it a life long habit. 

 

CHECK OUT THE LAST EDITION OF WEIGHT LOSS TIPS--->HERE!!!

 

 

 



A Moment of Meditation

I took an unintended blog break last week.  Work was crazy, the weekend was crazier, and our internet went down some time between Saturday and Sunday and didn't come back up until last night.  By that time, I was nestled on the couch catching up on Game of Thrones--and don't worry if you haven't watched it yet--I'm not one to hand out spoilers. 

Yesterday morning started at 3:00 when Number Two woke up screaming his head hurt.  I worried it was an aneurism or something because he was in so much pain, but alas it was an ear infection. Now just because you really want to know, I'll tell you he has brownish red goopy stuff draining out of his ear and a nice fever too.  So I stayed home with him yesterday, took him to the doctor, and did a bunch of sitting around.  I read almost a whole book.  I didn't have internet, so I needed to find something to do while he slept and watched hours and hours of cartoons. 

This morning, I woke up early and went for a run.  I saw the sun rise as I was running, and it made me smile in awe.  How often do we stop and just look at the natural beauty around us.  (Ok--I didn't stop, because I was running, but I took it all in).  I was there in the moment, soaking it all in without the distraction of kids, noise, technology, you name it.  We have all but abandoned the idle time of stopping and smelling the flowers, but idle time is necessary for us to de-stress.  Idle time is necessary for our creative juices to flow.  Absorbing nature, the sunset, the sunrise, and just being in the moment is so important for us.  I've been trying to take a moment out of every day to just breath.  To do absolutely nothing.  Maybe this is what people get from meditation, which I still haven't mastered, but I understand the feeling of calm that comes with the moment of realizing you're alive and you're watching a beautiful sunrise and you have absolutely nothing else better to do at that moment because you just ARE.  Amazing. 

Tomorrow I intend to go to the gym, but before I go I'll open my door and stick my head outside.  I'll hear the early morning chirps of the birds as they're waking up or waiting for their Momma birds to bring them worms.  The coyotes howling in the distance and the cows lowing in the field behind my neighborhood, plus the smell of a dew-covered grass about to wake to the dull morning light. A moment of meditation. 

A Runner's Diary

My compression sleeves came in yesterday, and I tried them out today.  I do have to say they really help the shin splints!  These things are comfortable too.  I don't know why, but the word compression made me think they'd be really tight. They're not.  They fit nicely over my calves and it's like having a second layer of skin.  Plus, they are the fashion statement of the century!  I mean, these things are stylish!!!

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00DNO3IBS/ref=twister_B005JW0ZPO

I only ran a measly 1.09 miles today.  I'm trying to build up this week.  1 today, 2 tomorrow, 3 Friday.  I'm working on pacing.  This weekend I went running and my pace was too fast and by 2.65 miles I couldn't run anymore.  I'm trying to get to the point where I can pace and run the whole thing without feeling completely worn out by the end.  Today my pace was 12 minutes 30 seconds.  That's pretty slow, but I don't really care because at that pace I could have gone another mile or two easily and possibly increased my 2nd mile pace and definitely increased my 3rd mile pace. 

Number One, the athlete in the family, told me the other day, "Mom, you should take your time running your first and second mile and then sprint the third.  If you do that, then you're sure to win, because most people run too fast in the 1st and 2nd mile and then are worn out by the end."

I'm part of the "most people" he's talking about.  I really do think the cross-training is helping though.  I've been cycling, doing Zumba, swimming, and I feel like it's helped me gain control of my breathing so when I run I don't generally feel like I'm going to have an asthma attack anymore.  My capacity for cardio has increased.  Weight training on the other hand...

Today, because it was unnecessarily cold (thank you Mother Nature for throwing that curve ball--it's almost May, don't ya know?) I kept coughing.  Running is the one sport where it's acceptable to wipe your snot on your sleeve and keep going.  I often think about things like that when my feet are pounding the pavement and also this: If you're running a marathon do you just pee in your pants?  I think I would.  I always have to pee and there's no way I could run that far without going.  There's no way I'll ever run that far anyway.  I'm not a long distance runner.  I want to be able to run 5 miles comfortably and just do it again and again and again, but I have absolutely no desire to torture my body and run 26.2 miles. 

I digress.  This week my challenge to myself is to maintain a 12 minute pace and run 2 and 3 miles tomorrow and Friday.  I also want to run the downtown route on Saturday, so I can work on hills for the 5k I'm running on the 26th. 

 

Let's get this party started!

The First Mile Is Always the Hardest

I ran a slow mile today, while my phone dictated again that I was Superwoman Fast.  I was not.  Something is wrong with my GPS--I'm sure.  I came home, and I downloaded MapMyRun to replace Endomondo, and I mapped out what I ran.  I did a lovely 2.13 miles in 25 minutes.  That's pretty darn slow! 

The first mile is always the hardest though.  The first few minutes with your feet hitting the pavement.  During that period of time, you tell yourself you want to quit.  It's the same with Spin.  It's the same with writing.  Heck, sometimes, it's the same with anything new you're trying.  That's why I like running--it's such a challenge. It makes me realize I can do something I never thought I'd be able to do.  I feel so good once I get through the first mile, and I know at that point I can make it to the second mile and so on.  But sometimes, I just stop.  I stop when I'm ahead, or when I don't think I can move another muscle. I stop when I'm behind or because I'm telling myself I can't keep going. Sometimes I stop, because I have a defeatist attitude. 

I've defeated myself so many times in my life.  I stopped writing for years, because I thought no one would like what I wrote.  I stopped exercising, because it got hard.  I basically stopped trying.  I want my kids to see my try and succeed.  I want to be a healthy influence on them, and I want to stop defeating myself. 

I want to tell myself these things: I can run a mile.  I can run 2 miles. I can run a 5K.  I can write a book.  I can get a book published.  I can do anything I want to do if I just round the corner and get past the first mile.  The first mile is always the hardest.  That's where your legs tweak, your breath catches, and you run into little roadblocks that can stop you if you let them.  I'm going to run around the roadblocks from now on.  I'm going to reach my goals: exercise, career, and life.  I'm not going to let the little things stop me from achieving what I want to do in life and from winning the race. 

If you quit in the middle, you never know how far you could have gone. 

 

 

 

 

 

Working Toward a Goal Again

It's raining cats and dogs here today.  Torrential rain accompanied by near-constant lightning and thunder. When I was little, I used to say God was having a bowling party, and that's what it sounds like outside. The thunder is so loud the glass in the window next to my chair just vibrated.  Oh I can't wait to do school drop-off in this weather and drive to work through sheets of rain.

Needless to say, I didn't run this morning.  This is our second day of rain, and I didn't run yesterday even though I should have.  The rain yesterday fell all day, but there wasn't a thunderstorm. 

I have decided I can't do three days in a row of running.  I know I've said before that "can't" is another four letter word, but the muscles in my legs hurt, especially around my previous injury and I worry and don't run efficiently.  I'm separating my running days by a rest day now, and I think it will really help.  I'm not just "resting" on my rest day.  I'm doing other activities: Zumba, Spin, or simply going to the gym to run the treadmill and lift weights.  Tonight, I'm going to Zumba.  I mainly feel silly doing Zumba, because I don't think I'm the best dancer but I like the exercise and the music!  It's fun, and before you know it--it's over. 

I had grand visions of beating my time in this 5K race I'm doing here in a few weeks, but I've decided that's not really important.  What's important is getting out there and doing it.  Training by body to run the whole way, and then doing another 5K in a month or so.  Just getting on the wagon and not falling off. 

I feel like last year I came so far.  I'd really made exercise part of my life.  I'd lost weight.  And then--somehow I gained part of it back.  I stopped working out as much.  I started eating more, and now it feels like there's a mountain in front of me to climb.  I know I can do it though.  I went back and read some of my weight loss posts from the last few years, and I can see how to succeed.  It's just getting there.  That's the hard part. 

 

 

 

 

I'm Superwoman Fast!

I went out running this morning, just me and the pollen whooping it up!  Either I've gotten really fast, or my GPS messed up.  I completed my first mile in 8 minutes 29 seconds, although I think it was really about 10 minutes 29 seconds by the time I made a mile.  And I completed my second mile in record time: 6 minutes and 21 seconds.  I've gone from turtle slow to Superwoman Fast!  Or--my GPS stunk today and couldn't figure out where the heck I was going. 

I'll go with Superwoman fast, because I'm always an optimist and rarely a realist.  Today was my Challenge day to run 2 miles and according to Endomondo I ran 2.65 miles in 21 minutes and 21 seconds. I'm thinking I ran about 2 miles in that time, but who knows.  I'm just glad I got out there and ran. 

Running is such a challenge for me every time I do it.  I have my breathing on track, which is half the battle.   I don't feel like I'm huffing and puffing or dying, but most of the time one of my muscles in my legs or calves start to tweak, and I want to stop.  Today, I felt the best I ever had running.  I let my mind run through the list of items I had on tap for today.  I worked on plotting out a story in my head, and at one point it didn't feel like I was running at all, it just felt like I was going somewhere. 

I really do think the key to running is to get your mind out of it.  Release yourself and your tension, the way you do with Yoga.   You have to find a way to not realize what you're doing while you're doing it.  Make it second nature, like the words flowing out of your mouth when you're speaking your naturally-born language. 

I've been there before, and I'm going to get there again: this time without injuring myself!