Finding Time to Write

 

I'm trying not to neglect this blog, but it's so hard to find the time to sit down and write right now.  We are beyond busy.  I always want to get on my knees and thank the Lord when gymnastics meet season is over, because I feel like it frees up so much time. Not.so.much.this.year. 

Number One still has three days of gymnastics, Number Two and Darling Daughter are taking swimming lessons twice a week, and Number Two is also in the middle of soccer season.  We are busy.  Plus, I'm really trying to commit to working out five days a week.  I usually do that in the morning, aka blog time, so it limits my writing time.

Yes, I just gave you a bunch of excuses why I can't write.  Excuses are excuses, and I can be full of them sometimes!  I use excuses to excuse myself from working out too.  My shin is hurting, I didn't sleep enough last night, etc.  You can always find valid excuses when you're trying to avoid something or when you don't want to commit to something. 

But I have some good excuses too.  I've been trying to meat up a couple of stories to send away to a few contests on May 1st.  I have a deadline, and those are my first priority before blogging. My writing energy has been directed towards that purpose.  I still need an editor, or a circle of friends who is willing to be constructively critical.  I'll take just plain old criticism at this point: it doesn't even have to be constructive.  I edit my own works, over and over again, but sometimes having a fresh pair of eyes is what you need.  Where does one find a group of people who are willing to read your work for free and edit?  A group of people who has time on their hands?  I have no idea.  All my friends are in the same busy boat as I am, barely keeping it from sinking with everything going on in their lives. 

Sometimes I get so discouraged. I feel like I'll never make it as a writer if I can't devote my whole existence to it.  I read an encouraging blog the other day, and I wish I could remember the name, but it said this: Everyone's first draft sucks.  I liked that.  The blog also said you must devote one hour a day for the rest of your life to writing if you want to be heard, want to be published, want to get your name out there.  I'm not sure I even have one free hour now.  Somehow, I have to fit it in.  Fit it in between work, chauffeuring to swimming lessons, spin class, dinner time, bath time, and stick it into one of the two free bookend hours of my day before I go back to sleep.  I need to do it. I need to commit to it they way I've recommitted to exercise.  I need to realize everyone goes through rejection and everyone's first draft sucks.  Writing is about work and about dedication and about doing what I love.  Without that, I'd never be heard.

Runner's Block

I wonder if it's possible to have runner's block.  I mean, I've heard of writer's block, and by the looks of it--I have that too. 

Every time, lately, I go for a run and my mind blocks me from getting it accomplished.  I think thoughts along the line of this, "What if my leg starts hurting again?" or "What if I can't breath."  Oh the challenges of post-injury running and asthma! 

This morning, I had no good excuse.  It was a brisk 47 degrees, and my breaths were synchronized from the start, and yet I kept stopping.  My mind was screaming, WHY THE HELL ARE YOU STOPPING, yet I kept doing it.  I'm training of a 5K, but at this rate I'll be walking it.  I guess that's okay.  Some days I think I'm jut not cut out to be a runner.

Yesterday I received some advice in an unlikely place, Chappy's Deli.  I'd taken the boys there for lunch while Rob visited the dentist for the first time in ten, er four years.  While the boys ate hamburgers and I dug into a very healthy buffalo chicken wrap, ranch dressing and all, our waiter sort of neglected us, until he didn't. 

He came over and yawned then apologized by saying, "I'm sorry I ran 10 miles this morning before work."

"I'm a wannabe runner," I said. 

"Yeah?  Well I was in the military, and then I packed on the pounds. I've lost 60 since I started running again in October.  I know you wouldn't believe that.  I'd packed on the muscle and bulked up and it all turned to fat after I stopped exercising. I'm running the Joy to Life Run in April."

"I'm trying to do that run too.  I did it last year, and then I was injured and I've had a hard time recovering."

"When I run I pretend I'm somewhere else.  Like fantasy--I'll pretend I'm watching my favorite show, or traveling, or I'll just delve into my music and before I know it--the run is over, before it feels like it began.  Also--the best way to get better at running short distances is to run long distances."

So--I'm going to take his advice.  I'm going to go to fantasy land in my head, aka take my head out of it.  He went on to tell me I'm defeating myself.  He said running is so much about body over mind, that I have to get my mind out of it.  That's hard for someone who has a thinking problem like me, but I just need to do it. 

I'm challenging myself to run every day this week, even if I only run a mile at a time--something is better than nothing.  And I'm not starting the long distances yet.  First I have to get to the 3.1 miles without stopping myself--then I can talk ten. 

Begin Again

I started running again on Saturday.  I'm taking it slow.  I threw myself full force back into Taekwondo last week, and even with jumping I didn't have pain in my stress fracture.  I know I need to take it easy and build up with the running.

Yesterday I ran 1.01 miles in 10 minutes 22 seconds.  I was trying to achieve between an 11 and 12 minute mile.  I have such problems with pacing, and I wear myself out because of it, and then I want to stop. 

Today, I ran 1.02 miles in 13 minutes 32 seconds.  This was too slow, but I was really having a problem with the humidity today.  I actually walked a mile afterwards, and I walked FASTER than I had run.  I walked 1.04 miles in 12 minutes 51 seconds!  Oh well--it's a process, and I built up before.  I'll do it again!

I feel like running is such mind over matter.  Half the time I'm running, my brain wanders and begins to tell me I can't keep going.  You have to train your brain and your body in order to get into shape, and in order to run.  You have to look at the street in front of you and think to yourself, "a mile is really not that far."  You have to tell yourself that you CAN DO THIS, and most of all you have to just KEEP going.  In the end, it's completely worth it. 

Joy to Life

I know.  I've been missing in action.  I haven't blogged for over a week.  I've been seriously busy with LIFE.

What have I been doing that's taking up so much of my time?

1) Getting three kids to smile, while wearing pretty clothes (um, make that handsome clothes for the boys)...and a BOW!!!

 

 

2) I'm pretty sure this one speaks for itself...

 

 

 



3) Reading -- I've pretty much had my head stuck in a book the last two or three weeks...or maybe my whole life. 

 

 

4) Eating -- hey, it was Easter.  Um, I'm paying for the splurge now to the tune of 5 extra pounds!

 

 

 

THINGS I DIDN'T DO OVER THE LAST WEEK, BUT SHOULD HAVE DONE:

 

1) Exercise--boo.  I was lazy.

 





2) Clean -- this could be on my list every week.  I hate cleaning.

 

 

And last, but certainly not least, the one thing I'm very proud of having DONE THIS WEEK was signing up for the Joy to Life Walk/Run. I will do the 5K!  I need to train MORE.  Aghh!!!  I signed up yesterday, and I earned a free cupcake at Gigi's (as if I needed more incentive to exercise!)   I want to raise $500. Click below and just put in my name, Lauren Greene, and make your donation to this cause.  This cause is very personal to me, because my grandmother had the cancer gene, and she had cancer many times in her life, including breast cancer.  We all know someone who has been diagnosed with breast cancer, so why not give towards finding a cure.  THANKS!!!

 

                                         CLICK RIGHT HERE TO DONATE

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Random Rambles

I've been slacking in the running department this week.  Yesterday, I swore I would wake up today (Friday) and go for a run, and I didn't.  Last time I ran I had a horrible shin splint, and I thought I would just rest it.  Well, I haven't run since last weekend.  It's not like I haven't been active though.  I went to Taekwondo on Monday and Tuesday and then kisado on Wednesday.  I skipped yesterday and went out to Mexican with the family instead. 

I know that with running, I really need to keep it up for my mileage.  I was disappointed this week though.  I had intentions of signing up for the Shamrock Shuffle.  I even blogged about it: Right Here.  Well, I double booked.  I can't run that day, because Number One's State Meet for gymnastics is that day in Birmingham.  It's more important for me to support Number One than to go run a 10K.  I think the disappointment led to me making excuses about why I couldn't run this week.  I just need to get myself back out there.  No excuses, right? 

Darling Daughter woke up early this morning too, at 4:45.  Right now she's parked in front of Mickey Mouse Clubhouse playing with her beads and her Mardi Gras money.  I told her if she wakes up that early she needs to be quiet so I can write.  I have my headphones on, and I'm listening to "Skinny Love," by Bon Iver over and over again.  I love this song.  There's something about his voice and the pure emotion that emanates from the song that makes me want to listen to this song over and over again.  The loss of love, something turning out the opposite way of what you expected, everyone in the world has had those feelings before.  I can relate.

Anyway, I totally digressed and this blog is just one big ramble so I'll just keep going with it. Yesterday I tried some of Darling Daughter's summer clothes on her.  I went a little crazy buying for her this year, because I haven't bought clothes for her in about a year (or just a few clothes to fill in where we didn't have hand-me-downs).  Hubby took this fantastic photo of Darling Daughter and me last night, and I just love it.  I never realized how much she and I look alike, but we totally do.  Two peas in a pod.  My sidekick.  My shadow.  I love this girl so much.

I think I'm going to end my reckless ramblings and go work on my novel for an hour before it's time to get ready for work, and make it through Friday.  I won't be blogging this weekend, because Number One has another meet, and we'll be out town.  A Florida meet, so the competition will be even harder than Georgia. 

Weight Loss Tips #13: Scheduling and Consistency

I woke up today with the strangest memory.  I had this memory of going down to the Alabama River with my parents when I was a kid, sitting on the big steps and eating a huge Wendy's cheeseburger. (This is probably because my husband left Wendy's coupons in the kitchen for some unknown reason!)  My parents used to take the four of us down to the river on Sundays a lot.  It was one of the only times we would be allowed to have fast food and SODA!  We would picnic, watch the boats on the river, and then play on the long-since gone wooden playground near the Silos.  Some of my best memories are from those Sundays spent with my family. 

Of course the portion sizes back then, even at Wendy's, were smaller than they are today.  So my huge Wendy's cheeseburger was (maybe) an appropriate size for a seven or eight year old girl wearing turquoise overalls covered in butterflies.  Oh the 80's! 

Anyway--I'll get to the point of this blog, because apparently I just love to change subjects.  One of my co-workers yesterday said this to me, "I don't know how you do everything, Lauren."  That little statement got me thinking, because you know, I just love to spin the wheels in my brain. 

What does it take to lose weight?  It takes a REALISTIC schedule and CONSISTENCY!  I have a little bit of an obsessive compulsive personality, and when I started out I wanted to workout every single night.  I wanted to go to Taekwondo no matter what else was going on in my life.  This was not REALISTIC!!!  For one thing, I was missing out on my children's lives.  Another, I was not giving my body the time it needed to rest.

So, when you're starting a workout routine you need to ask yourself: How many days can I feasibly workout?  What times can I go?  When can I fit this into my schedule?  You need to do this and still make sure you have time for yourself, time for your spouse, time for your kids, and time to rest.  So, if the only times you have to work out are at 5 AM, then I suggest finding a morning Boot Camp, or finding a really good video that you know you'll stick to.  I, for one, really like a class because of the accountability factor, but classes are not for everyone and will not fit into everyone's lives as easy as they have into mine. 

And now for the big one: BE CONSISTENT!!!  Once you start eating well and exercising right make it a part of your life.  You know how they always say the key to disciplining a child is consistency.  Well the key to disciplining yourself is exactly the SAME.  Once you've committed to going to the gym three days a week: GO!  Stop making EXCUSES!!!  It will take weeks and weeks before you actually want to do it, so just drag yourself out of the house with the negative talk going in your head, until one day you just get in your car and drive there and realize this is now a part of your life. 

The same goes for eating well.  Yes, eating a big Wendy's burger every once in a while, will not derail you, but once you've changed the way you eat you need to try to stick with it.  Go to the grocery store and make the right food choices.  Read labels, and see if you're eating actual food or just STUFF with salt added.  Gravitate towards natural foods and try to eat whole foods more often.  Soon, you'll notice that instead of that candy bar for snack you'll want some carrots, a banana, or some nuts. 

 

If you missed last week's edition: HERE IT IS!

 

*Artwork found on Google

 

 



Excuses

I woke up making excuses this morning for why I couldn't go for my run.  The excuses went like this: it might be cold, I have to drive to Atlanta tonight, I'm not even packed, I'm still sore from Taekwondo last night and kisado the night before, and the best one ever: I just don't want to go.  All of these excuses got me thinking, as I dressed reluctantly for my run and headed out the door. 

As I ran I thought about excuses, and I thought that I really need to stop making them.  I sat on the couch for years making excuses about why I couldn't do things.  I can't write, because no one will want to read it, or I'll never come up with a good enough story, or my dialogue and description stinks. I can't exercise because I don't have enough time.  I can't eat healthy because healthy food costs too much money.

Give me a break!  When you make excuses, the only person you're holding back is yourself. You're stopping yourself from realizing your full potential.  Stop making excuses about why you can't do things and start making excuses about why you have to! 

I have to exercise, because it's good for my health and my body and my mind.  I have to write, because it's something I love to do, it gives me a feeling of satisfaction, and it makes me feel whole.  I have to eat healthy foods to nourish my body and to set an example for my children so that they live healthy lives too. 

It's just as easy to make a positive excuse to do something than a negative one, and it makes you feel about a thousand times better.  Postive excuses also help motivate you, while negative excuses help you procastinate: putting off something that could change your life in ways you never realized. 

I'm still making excuses though. Today I had to do an interval run.  One minute fast, 1.5 minutes slow.  I HATE interval running.  Every time the lady's voice would ring out through my headphones and say, "One minute fast," in her sing-song voice, I'd think to myself, "Geez lady, I'm not a gazelle!"   Then when she would come on and say, "One minute thirty seconds slow," I'd think, "Is walking slow enough?  Can I just walk?"  I was making excuses to a recorded voice in my iPhone (thanks Mike--it's spelled correctly here!).  And that is so silly.  So I started making good excuses to myself, "The quicker I run, the quicker I can get home to my coffee, type my blog, and work a little bit on my novel."  That was my motivation, and it worked. 

For my interval workout today, I did 2.19 miles in 21 minutes 38 seconds for an average minute per mile of 9 minutes 54 seconds.  Not so bad, even though I did walk a little bit.  Next time I'll have to make a perfectly good excuse NOT to walk!

*Artwork found on Google.