Time

Since school started, I've commented how there is so little time in the day.  People ask me all the time where I find time to write.  How do you find time to work, to exercise, to be a Mom and to write?  Let me ask you this: how do you find time to breath?  Writing for me is almost like breathing.  I feel best when I'm writing.  Take it as a form of therapy, or a way to work through some problem I'm having, or just a way to escape from the harsh reality of the world sometimes.  When I'm writing I feel the most well adjusted.  I feel whole.

I read Stephen King's, "On Writing," and he was discussing people who only had one book published or only EVER wrote one book, and he made some flippant comment like, "What were they doing with all their time?  Knitting socks?"  When you're a writer you're driven to write.  You're motivated to do it, because it's what you like doing best.  You write because you HAVE to write. When I watch Number One on the P-bars or the rings and I see how he sometimes reluctantly leaves the floor if he hasn't perfected the skill, I understand, because that's how I feel about writing.  Determined to make it perfect.  Determined not to give up.  Determined to succeed. 

So how do I find the time?  I make the time.  I wake up super early: 5:00-5:30, depending on whether I've hit the snooze button.  I check Facebook, and I usually lose a few games of Candy Crush, the world's biggest time suck, then I pour my second cup of coffee and I edit or write.  I research ideas, or I simply put my fingers to the keyboard and type to my heart's content.  I'm usually a little miserable when the alarm on my phone goes off reminding me I have a real job and that's it time to get ready for the day.

At night, I do the same thing again.  I use all the minutes of the day to do the thing I'm most driven to do: write.  It's my passion, and I can feel the determination pouring from me, and it's a lot better use of my time than playing Candy Crush, or surfing Facebook, or watching cheesy movies and shows on Netflix or Amazon Prime.  (Although I do admit that I do those things--everyone needs a break from work every once in awhile, even if it's work you love). 

In order to succeed you have to work hard.  You have time if you look for it, even if it's twenty minutes a day to do the thing you love the best or the thing you must need to do for yourself: Just do it.  Stop making excuses, go for it and live your dreams.

Motivation Revisited...Again

I've always had problems with motivation.  In high school, I think I studied a handful of times.  My Dad and I would have yelling, screaming matches, as he would try to have me do my homework downstairs at the breakfast room table, just trying to make sure I got it done. I usually did finish it, with a lot of huffing and puffing. 

In college, I was self motivated, mainly because my goal was to stay as far away from home as I could.  I was in Washington D.C., and I was loving life, and my ability to stay there hinged on me not failing out of school.  I did it, pulling off a 3.75 and figured out how to set attainable goals, but still when I left school I was an idealist and somewhat thought things would just be handed to me.  I didn't realize you have to work hard for everything you want.  What you put in is what you get out. 

For a long time I was afraid.  I still am, some most days.  Afraid to succeed, afraid of rejection, afraid to love, afraid to get to0 close, afraid to lose.  But you can't live your life being afraid.  You have to take that initial step, that risk; in order to succeed you have to risk failing first. 

Son Number One is a motivated kid.  After getting used to (and hating homework), he now studies his times tables in the car.  He works hard at gymnastics.  He'll work extremely hard to earn points to get rewards.  He inherently *knows* how the system works.  I wish I had at age 8, but I was lost in my make believe world, busy playing with my imaginary friends and living in fantasy land.  Some days I still live in fantasy land.  Fantasy land can be a wonderful diversion, but it won't get you anywhere.  You can say: I'm going to win the lottery, but if you never buy a ticket then you definitely WILL NOT. 

Sometimes when things don't go my way I start acting like a petulant child.  Maybe everyone is this way.  But I start to drive all the motivation out of my body.  All I want to do is sit on the couch and be lazy and ignore everyone.  I have to fight super hard against that to get myself back in the game.  This week I got back into the game.

I risked, and I won a little bit, and I lost a little bit.  Here's what happens when you take a risk:

• I motivated myself to stay on MyFitnessPal, and I lost 3 pounds
• I started editing my book again.  I sent out to another agent.  I wrote some words.
• I received a rejection, but it was a nice rejection encouraging me to keep working on my second novel and sending out to other agents. 
• Despite feeling lazy yesterday, I left the house and cycled 5.5 miles.  I burned 314 calories.

To me, setting the goals and motivating yourself is worth taking the risk.  What's the worst that can happen?  If I never submitted my book, or finished my book, or even started writing my book then NOTHING would happen.  But, because I finished a novel and started submitting it, I'm getting feedback, and even if that feedback is negative it's encouraging me to keep at it: to follow my dreams.  It's showing me that I CAN DO THIS!!!  Take a risk, and you will succeed.  Motivate yourself and you will get there. 

Do Nothing, and you will get exactly that: NOTHING!