Finding Balance

I think the thing I hear most from my friends, family and other writers is, "How in the world do you find time to write with three kids?" I also get this question about how I find time to read. And the answer is simple: you make time to do what you love.  Do what you love, and you'll love what you do. That's my new mantra. Excuses take away from success, so I'm done making excuses in every part of my life.

But, that said, I still find it hard to achieve balance in my life. I become so absorbed with my characters when I'm writing that they seem to be living with me. I think about them in the shower, when I'm eating, and when I'm watching Number Two play basketball. I think about how they'd react to a certain person, what they would say, and even what they would order at a restaurant. Writers are a little crazy like that: they always have someone else living in their heads.

On Monday, Darling Daughter was diagnosed with double ear infections. I'm hoping she won't need tubes again, but she may. When I came home from the day job that night, I was on a mission to put "No Turning Back" on Createspace, order my cover and spine. Nothing could get in my way, and as a result I sat on the couch with the computer as kiddos clambered over me, but mostly I ignored them. And I felt bad. I felt bad the next day when Darling Daughter woke up and crawled into my lap, throwing her arms around me (still, and not for much longer, smelling a little bit like a baby), and kissed me on the cheek. She said, "I love you Mommy."  And my heart melted, and I decided I would have to take a day off from (or rather the night off) from writing, editing, or doing the next thing that needed to get done on Tuesday. I needed to spend time with the kids. So we went to my Mom and Dad's house, and Darling Daughter followed my Mom around while I watched Rio with Hubby and Number Two. Number One was busy at the gym perfecting his kip on the high bars.

Still, I felt better that night, like I had been present for them.  And to top it all off, Number Two and I read "The Giving Tree," before bed. And I told him how giving and caring he is, and how I'm envious of those qualities that seem to reside in his soul.

Balance is hard for me. When I get absorbed in a work-in-progress, it's hard for me to pull myself away.  How do you find balance between your work/life?  Having a day job, kids, and trying to write (more or less full time) is tricky business.

That's A Wrap...Almost

So it's the last week of NaNoWriMo, and I still have a long way to go.  For those of you who don't know NaNoWriMo is National Novel Writing Month.  I've never participated before, but having a self-imposed (or nationally imposed in this case) deadline can actually help the creative juices flow. I just guess I like to be on a really tight deadline.  One month is not enough, let's try to write 50,000 words in ten days.

The thing is, I've probably written more than 50,000 words this month, between blogging, re-writing my other novel, and then starting my new novel.  I'm at 25,000 words in the new novel, and I can't relate the topic on this site because it's R rated, or maybe even NC-17, okay, definitely NC-17.

I've also found during the writing process, I like to listen to the same song over and over again.  The song of choice depends on my mood, but for my current project about two couples who become entangled in a web of lies and deceit that song is Hurt by Nine Inch Nails.  Yes, I know a lot of you who actually know me are laughing now, because I'm so not a NIN fan, but there is just something about this song.  I love the Johnny Cash version of the song too. Plus, the words relate to what's going on in my novel.  I wonder if any other authors listen to songs on repeat, or am I just crazy?  Regardless, I can't get enough of this song right now, and I wonder if the angst of the lead singer is coming out in my novel. I sure hope so!

Enough of that. I'm releasing Chapter 4 of The Devil Within on Wattpad tonight.  If you haven't read it, then click on the link above to offer me your support.  Wattpad allows writers to publish their work in pieces for others to read free.  It's a great way to support fledgling authors, and for me I'm using it to, *hopefully*, build up an audience so when I release my e-book I at least have a few buyers.  You can sign-up for Wattpad, favorite and comment.  If you see any grammatical errors, please let me know. The Devil Within has not been edited by a professional, and I'm editing it as I go, but I don't always catch every little mistake.  Plus, it's a rough draft, so there will definitely be mistakes out there.

I feel like this week, I've really made writing a priority. I still find it a struggle to balance everything: life, kids, work, writing, and exercising.  When I'm writing I get so caught up in the world I've created that other things start to slide in level of importance, and I tend to feel guilty.  Last night, I made it a point to lay in bed with the kids and talk to them about their weekend.  I asked them what they were excited about in this upcoming week, and we had a nice chat.  I need to find the balance to be able to write every day without feeling like I need to sprint, so I have more quality time with the kids on the weekend when we're all home together.  I know this is something every author struggles with, especially at the beginning when you're having to, not only write, but market yourself and make a name for yourself so you can stand out from the millions of other aspiring artists.  I'll get there one day.

Until then...Dream Big!

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